Jake stepped into the shower, closed his eyes, and tilted his face up toward the scalding spray of water, letting it cascade down over his skull. He wet his hair and blindly reached for shampoo, then lathered and rinsed himself free of the sudsy foam. His face and body was next. The scent of vanilla filled the humid air as he soaped up, working his way from top to bottom.
At some point while he scrubbed, his dick decided to take a liking to the tactile sensations of hot water and his hands roaming his skin. Being Saturday night -- and over a week since he’d gotten laid -- his balls weren’t too choosy about who fulfilled their desires.
He wrapped a soapy hand around his shaft and gave it a good, firm pump from base to tip, working his foreskin back and forth over the sensitive crown. Pleasurable tingles radiated from his dick, prompting him to repeat the caress again. And again. Glancing down, he watched his cock slide through the snug tunnel of his fist, the rounded tip appearing with every downward pull. Clear pearls of desire lubricated the taut sheath of his foreskin and dripped from his slit, only to be quickly washed away by the shower’s mist. With a tight grip, he stroked harder. Tension coiled in his groin as his balls inched closer to his pelvis. Through the slick fist sliding up and down his shaft, he could feel his pulse echo through his shaft and gain momentum, racing toward the finish. He stroked faster, his attention centered on the uppermost inches of his cock.
Mmm, just a little more
The sound of ringing bells filled the air, though muted through by the thick glass of the shower door. “Fuck.” Jake twirled around underneath the water and quickly rinsed off. He was damn tempted to ignore the doorbell -- and Logan, who was probably pacing out in the hall while he waited. He grabbed a towel from the rack and hastily scrubbed his skin dry as made his way through the apartment, leaving a trail of wet footprints on the hardwood floor in his wake.
After knotting the white towel around his hips, Jake pulled open the door. “What do you -- Oh…” Evening air raced across his body, chilling his skin and causing an avalanche of goose bumps. He stared at Kane, flabbergasted to find the man standing outside his home, wearing a cocky grin and holding a large white and red pizza box.
What the hell is he doing here?
Not bothering to disguise his interest, Kane looked Jake up and down. “If this is how you greet all your visitors, I’ll have to come by more often.”
“You think so?”
“Definitely.” Kane sauntered past Jake and into the apartment, brushing up against him as he walked by.
“By all means, come on in.” Jake flicked his wrist, and the door shut with a thud. He turned and watched Kane set the pizza box down on one of the black stools in front of the bar. “Make yourself at home.”
“I was being sarcastic, asshole.”
Kane propped his hip against the bar. “I know.”
you doing here, Kane?” Jake edged closer, conscious of being practically naked in front of his old lover. He was proud of his body, and under normal conditions, he didn’t mind flaunting it, but it wasn’t the figure he’d had at sixteen. As much as he worked out, it never would be again. Growing old was hell on a gay man’s self-image.
“You forgot your pizza. I had to wait until the restaurant closed -- we’re too short-staffed for me to leave earlier -- but I brought it to you.”
“Uh-huh. That may be a decent excuse for the start of a porno, but I’m not buying it. What do you want, Kane?” Jake finger combed his wet hair, pushing it away from his face. Water dripped from the curling ends and trickled down his back in itchy rivulets, further dampening the towel around his ass.
“Cutting right to the chase, huh? Okay, I can do that.” Kane ran his hand over his lower face, a mannerism Jake recognized as something he only did when nervous. “I wanted to tell you how much I regret the things that happened when we were kids. I can’t tell you how much I’ve thought about that day over the years and wished I could change it. I know it’s probably a case of too little, too late, but I’d really like it if you could forgive me.”
Not fucking likely
. “No problem. It was a long time ago.”
“Great.” Kane shot him a tremulous smile. “Maybe now that I’m back in town, we could hang out some time. Catch up on old times and stuff.”
“Yeah, sure.” So not going to happen
. “As long as we can, uh, both work it into our schedules.”
“Of course. Things are crazy at the restaurant right now, but I’m sure it’ll improve once I can get a few more reliable people hired. So, um, what do you do now? For a living, I mean. I remember how you used to talk about moving to Europe and painting. Being the next Picasso.”
Jake rested his ass on one of the two barstools and sighed. Small talk was going to be the death of him. “The painting thing didn’t work out. I had big aspirations and little actual talent, or so my college art instructor said. I work in interior design now.”
“Yeah. It’s all right. So, uh…” Jake searched for something to say. Frankly, he had a lot of questions, but he wasn’t entirely sure he wanted to know the answers. Part of him wanted to ask how Kane knew where he lived, but it didn’t take a genius to figure it out. Blacksburg was a small town, and he was listed in the phone book. Hell, Kane only needed to look as far as his own pizza delivery database.
Kane’s kid and the whole gay/not gay thing crowded into the forefront of his mind, but he didn’t want to touch that subject right now. He felt like he was treading on eggshells as it was. “How did you end up Mama Celeste’s? I didn’t even know it was for sale. No one thought Giuseppe would ever retire. He has to be pushing seventy by now.”
“Well,” Kane said as he settled back against the wall, “believe it or not, my parents kept in contact with a few people from here after we moved. When my mother passed away last year, Giuseppe came to her funeral. We talked afterward, and he mentioned that he wanted to retire but couldn’t really afford to close the restaurant unless he had a buyer, someone he could trust to keep the pizzeria open and not ruin what he’d spent his life working to build. Since Brock had already been accepted to Tech, it seemed like fate’s way of stepping in and pointing out what I should do. I’m not sure he likes that his old man followed him here, but it does make it more convenient for him to bum money off of me.”
“I’m sorry to hear about your mom.”
“Hey, it’s okay. I miss her, but she was ready to join Dad.”
“Your dad’s gone too, then?”
“Yeah. Lung cancer took him a little over five years ago. What about your folks?”
“Gone. They were in a car wreck not long after Logan and I graduated high school.”
“I’m sorry. That must have been rough.”
“Yeah, but it was a long time ago.”
Awkward silence stretched between them. Jake fiddled with the towel around his hips and wondered if it would be rude to ask Kane to leave, so he could get dressed. Of course, if Kane left, there wouldn’t really be any need to cover up anyway.
Kane stuck his hands in the pockets and rocked back on his heels, drawing Jake’s attention to the bulge straining against the front of his pants. A package that looked quite a bit larger than Jake remembered. Remnants of his earlier desire crashed over him and made his dick to lurch and swell beneath the plush bath towel around his hips. He licked his lips, hungry for a taste of what the other man was hiding inside his Dockers.
He briefly considered making a move, until he looked up and met Kane’s eyes. Something flashed through Kane’s eyes and echoed inside Jake -- a static charge of old lust and the vestige of warm affection.
Things had ended shitty between them. Worse, he realized, was how his emotions for the other man had been trapped inside him, forced down by anger and never truly dealt with. He’d gone from being over the moon in love to being cast straight into the bowels of hell with no go-between, no closure to speak of.
Would it be such a bad idea to come onto him? Just fuck Kane and be done with it. Possibly get the man out of his system once and for all. Sex wasn’t a cure-all -- he knew that -- but it was real and tangible, and something Jake was good at. Surely, the chemistry they shared was nothing more than physical attraction. The pull he felt toward Kane was probably only a figment of Jake’s overactive imagination. A mere response from having seen someone who’d haunted him for twenty years. It had
to be. No one else had lasted beyond one fuck with him. He was confident Kane wouldn’t be any different. Sex would clear the cobwebs of his memory and would expose his feelings as nothing more than nostalgia. He didn’t want to feel anything for Kane. Not attraction, not hatred, not love. Absolutely nothing.
Jake stood, his arms hanging at his sides, and let his towel drop to the floor. “Whoops.”
Kane’s eyes rounded and then he bent at the waist, his gaze on the floor. “I’ll get it.” He plucked the towel off the floor and glanced up, his face level with Jake’s groin. “Uh…here.” He held up the towel and slowly straightened, his lean cheeks tinged with pink.
Jake accepted the cloth and wrapped it low around his hips, leaving the knot loose, the fabric gaping open over one thigh. “Thanks.”
Kane swallowed, his Adam’s apple bobbing. “No problem.”
They stood a foot apart, gazes locked. Kane’s chest rose and fell, taxing the snug fit of his polo shirt. Jake could smell him; a hint of Old Spice cologne and the musky aroma of a hard day’s work. A five o’clock shadow covered Kane’s jaw, the stubble only adding a roguish allure to his boy-next-door good looks. The way he looked at Jake -- the heat in his eyes, his dilated pupils -- was enough to entice Jake into taking a single step forward, closing the space between them.
He didn’t give himself a moment to rethink what he was doing or about the possible consequences. Right or wrong, he wanted Kane, and he was going to have him.
Jake crowded Kane against the bar and covered the other man’s lips with his. Kane gasped, his mouth pliable but unmoving under Jake’s. Just when he was sure Kane would push him away, Jake felt the other man’s hands land on his shoulders. Fingers rubbed over Jake’s skin as Kane’s lips parted.
Kane pulled Jake closer and deepened the kiss, sucking on Jake’s tongue like it was the sweetest thing he’d ever tasted. A deep moan escaped Jake, surprising him. He was not
a moaner and certainly not from something as simple as a kiss. Kane nibbled Jake’s lower lip, sucking on it, and his brain shorted out, no longer concerned about whether or not he’d made a peep.
One long kiss melted into another, their mouths moving in concert until Jake didn’t know which way was up. His heart galloped like an overworked field horse, and his dick ached, full to bursting with need. Kane tasted so good, a mix of salt and something sweeter, almost minty. It was the opposite of the cinnamon and spice flavor of the Big Red chewing gum Kane had favored in high school. The man’s soft, malleable tongue was like a mini cyclone as Kane licked over Jake’s teeth and explored the recesses of his mouth. He withdrew and taunted Jake to give chase with his own.
Kane’s fingers kneaded Jake’s shoulders, massaging muscles he hadn’t even realized were tight with stress. The tension fell away with a flex of Kane’s nimble fingers. A lesser man would’ve melted into a relaxed pile of goo at Kane’s feet, but that wasn’t the impression Jake wanted to leave with his former lover. No, he wanted to stun Kane and leave the man begging for more, not the other way around.
In an attempt to turn things around, Jake grabbed Kane by the upper arms, whirled him around, and backed him toward the sofa. It was closer than the bedroom, only a few feet away, and plenty wide enough to suit his purposes. Surely, Kane must’ve realized his intentions, but the other man didn’t break their kiss or resist, leading Jake to believe they shared the same ultimate goal -- sex.
After what felt like a millennia but couldn’t have been more than thirty seconds, the back of Kane’s legs finally ran into the arm of the couch. Jake gave Kane a light shove, pushed the man down on the couch, and then crawled on top of him. The towel snagged on something -- whether the couch or Kane’s belt, Jake didn’t know or care -- and was quickly forgotten as he straddled Kane’s narrow hips.
He looked down at Kane and saw the features of the boy he’d once loved shining out through the older man’s face. The roundness of youth was gone, replaced by sharp planes and angles. Tiny laugh lines radiated out from the corners of Kane’s eyes, hinting at all the years and experiences they hadn’t shared. Instead of being angry or disheartened at that thought, Jake wondered about what he’d missed out on, curious about all the intricate details that had shaped Kane into the man he’d become. However, he was smart enough not to ask. Questions would kill the mood. Knowing where Kane had been wasn’t pertinent to what they were about to do. They didn’t need to know each other’s life history in order to fuck. The fact that he’d never so much as wondered about any of his other lovers’ histories didn’t even occur to him.
Kane wrapped a hand around Jake’s neck and pulled him down for a kiss. Even as their lips smacked together, mouths open for more, Jake slid his hand between them and reached for Kane’s belt. As sexy as it felt to bare-assed naked while Kane was completely dressed, he wanted more skin, needed to see and feel everything Kane had to offer.
His fingers fumbled with the buckle, clumsy as Kane’s tongue entered his mouth and danced against his own. When it gave way, he felt like cheering. Only a button and zipper stood in the way of his reaching Kane’s cock, something he desperately wanted to see and touch.
God, how many times had they done this -- made out on a sofa, before or after school, on the weekends while their parents were at church? They were men now, but being with Kane still made Jake feel like a green youth. His balls ached and churned, ready to fire, as his body screamed for more. More skin, more physical contact.
Blindly, he popped the button Kane’s pants and slid the zipper down. Sticking his hand through the open flap, Jake reached into Kane’s pants.
Kane pulled his mouth away, his breath coming in choppy pants. “Wait.” He placed a hand against the center of Jake’s chest and pushed. “Stop.”